I am not a naturally assertive person, I am sorry to say. I try ... but it runs counter to my instincts. I often find myself wondering if my opinion or my displeasure with a situation actually matters ... That is why, I suppose, I am so fascinated with yelp.com. For example, I was reading the reviews of a used furniture store I was considering visiting and I noticed a bad review and, in return, the owner wrote back and scolded the reviewer for his comments. All I could think was how I would just die if I had spoken up and, in return, got a dressing down like that in print ... in public ... online! However, I had, in a few short months, come to rely on yelp for useful information and I wanted to contribute. When I realized that yelp strongly encourages using one's real name, I thought and thought before I decided that not only could I contribute to yelp but that I could use it as a therapeutic tool.
OK, to be fair, so far most of my reviews are glowing ... I have always been a big advocate of remembering to compliment as quickly as one might complain. Recently, though, I've written some more lukewarm reviews. These reviews are hardly scathing ... but, nonetheless, I can imagine myself walking into one of my not-so-favorite businesses and having someone yell, "Get the %*&! outta here, TWO STARS!" But, that's the trick of assertiveness, isn't it? You say what you think even if you risk angering or offending someone. Complimenting is important but, for someone like me, it's also easy and safe.
So, as I work myself up to give a genuinely bad review the next time I get genuinely bad service, I realize yelp is a good assertiveness training ground for me. I can mentally argue that I am not just griping on my own account but putting out useful information for others and encouraging, perhaps, fairness and civility by being honest about what I have experienced.
I never go anywhere, so it is difficult for me to yelp. Now I have contributed plenty to various online review sites, like Netflix and posted my valuable opinions on any number of topics on BCO, but I have not been so successful on yelp.
ReplyDeleteMaybe that will change when I join you in SF?
We'll see. I just think that customer service is something that if done right leaves you with less money and a slight nauseated feeling in the pit of your stomach. Or maybe I just am a weirdo.
I love this post tho, because your self-preception is so far removed from your actual self-presentation. You are assertive, confident and speak your mind in marvelous ways. But then I am biased, too.